Ep 26 Divine Worth Podcast: Embracing Your Worth in Different Seasons

Karen Papin: [00:00:00] Welcome to the divine worth podcast where we are letting go of our self doubt, anxiety, fear, and limiting beliefs so that we can step into the divine roles that God has for us. I am your host life coach, Karen Papin, and together we are embracing our divine worth and potential.

All right. Welcome to the divine worth podcast today. We have a special guest. Her name is Jackie Swainson. Jackie is a master certified trauma informed and ethical practice coach. She works with midlife women, helping them to gain clarity, grow, and feel empowered to blend the lessons of the past with the possibilities of the future.

So Jackie, thank you so much for coming on here and talking with us today.

Jackie Swainson: Oh, you’re very welcome. Thanks for the opportunity,

Karen Papin: Karen. Well, I’m excited that we get to talk and I especially love having coaches on here and hearing that So thank you for for being here and to begin I would love to hear How have you seen [00:01:00] God’s love and belief for you in your life?,

Jackie Swainson: Gosh, in so many ways. I was not raised, I was not raised in the church. I am still the only member in my entire family going back for generations that is a member of the church. But I was never, I was always afraid that life would just be this piece of time that we have, like in a child’s understanding, you know, you go to sleep and then you wake up, but that, like, this was it.

And I would ask questions to my parents and other people and well, you know, this is it. Nothing really satisfied me. So, I just couldn’t believe, in my mind, I couldn’t believe that there was this life and then just darkness. Like nothing, nothing left, nothing more. And it terrified me as a child.

And it opened my mind to starting to my own self discovery. And I read the scriptures that I did have. [00:02:00] Even through all the genealogies in the Old Testament, and I’m like, okay, but this didn’t really help me and, I had gone to school with a lot of kids in my neighborhood, younger girls who were good friends who were LDS, they’d gone to a few activities, and I just, I felt a bit of a pull, but I didn’t really do anything about it.

And then. When I was 18, I had met my husband, my boyfriend at that time, and he was LDS. So I started going to some of the meetings, and I started to feel something uncurling inside me. Like, just, it’s like something growing. It’s like a new, a new experience. And I, I felt these feelings, and, I wasn’t sure if they were and, and my husband said, you know, if I were to marry, I couldn’t marry you, anybody who wasn’t a member of the church.

And I thought, how,

how awful a statement was that? Like, how judgmental. That’s, that was my, because I was raised with liberal thoughts about life. And then, for about a year, I [00:03:00] struggled with, This thought about, I can’t, you know, I know there’s something there, but I don’t want to be forced into, right? I had to make my own decision.

And, when, the summer we were at the, the church booth at the fair making elephant ears and, you know, hamburgers and all that kind of stuff, and the missionaries were there and I just said, Elders, I’d like to take the discussions. Just out of the blue. Just out of my mouth. And I thought, okay, here we go.

And from that, so I felt that preparation period was a gift from God. that I get from the Lord in helping me to just ready to get some seeds planted. And the first thing I did before I’d asked the missionaries, is to read a Book of Mormon that my grandfather had given me when I was 13. And he had never read it.

It’s a 19, he had read it. He’d never joined the church. It was a 1920s edition of the Book of Mormon, like a really old one that I’ve still got. And I read it on my summer job and I felt I knew Jesus Christ [00:04:00] after reading it, even before getting to the end and following the promise. Like everything I read, and I didn’t have any discussions or anything around me to, to sort of force my reading or to guide it.

It was just a deep personal experience and it’s one of those things that’s , it was totally me and the Lord and I knew it, and it’s like I cannot ever deny that because I had that experience. I wasn’t coerced, I wasn’t, you know, strung along. I came to know Jesus Christ. And I knew that if Jesus Christ knows me, and if he is, he is who he says he is, then anything that comes from him is good and praiseworthy and is something that I should be involved in and follow.

And I have had all experiences in life that everybody experiences throughout. As women, we go up and down and we have children, we have, you know, sorrow, we have grace, we have doubt, we have all those things. But I have never. [00:05:00] I’ve never ever felt my testimony weakened, and that’s because of that first foundational experience of the reading the Book of Mormon and getting to know that Jesus Christ is Jesus Christ, who he says he is.

Karen Papin: What a great experience that you had reading the Book of Mormon and finding that out for yourself. And it sounds like Heavenly Father was there, like leading people into your life to kind of prep you for that particular experience.

Jackie Swainson: Absolutely. Absolutely.

Karen Papin: So how has, your perspective, of your own worth and, and your confidence in yourself, how has that changed from who you were before to then going and embracing the gospel of Jesus Christ and understanding his love for you?

Jackie Swainson: Well, I can honestly say I was never short on self confidence. As a kid, [00:06:00] I was the youngest of three and I was like, sort of the, I got to do everything and anything and I school was everything was easy for me and I was one of those kids that people like to dislike, because you can, you’re good at sports, you’re good at school, you know, my dad was a physician, you know, and just all these things that people look at you and think, Oh, well,

you

know, she’s got to be stuck up.

She’s got to be You know, all these things, and I was none of those. Like, I was always very authentic to myself. And I think because I was authentic to myself, I really knew that Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father are real. And they are there for me. They hear me. They know me. And most of all, they see me. Not just at my best, but at my worst.

And all the times in between. And that’s really important for women to remember, I think, is that when we are really struggling, someone knows. Like the Lord does know, you know, if [00:07:00] you’re depressed and I have, I’ve had, I have an anxiety disorder when I’m feeling those moments of anxiety that just come.

It’s like, okay, Lord, I know, you know, and see me right now and I’m just going to allow myself to fall into your grace and to just be in that space where it’s quiet and you’re with me and I can feel it. And it sounds easy to say it’s hard to do. But it’s such a powerful thing. I mean, the Lord is, He’s the reason for everything that I do.

He’s the reason for everything that we have. He, everything is because of, my Jesus, our Jesus. Everything is because of what He did for us. Of course, our Heavenly Father too. But my focus is to the Lord. To my father in heaven, it’s the same, but we forget, we become very casual in [00:08:00] our routines of the day, and don’t often give space and time to that thought about, I am a divine daughter of heavenly parents who love me.

And want me to come home and when we start taking ourselves out of that space that it gets easy to say, well, how come I don’t get my prayers answered or somebody so does, that this isn’t happening for me and I really want this, I really need this. Or I’m noticing a lot of women, in my coaching and just, in my wards and places I visit, you know, criticizing, other women, church leaders, church policy, their circumstances in life.

Might be difficult for them. You know, when having children or grandchildren who are gay or LGBTQ plus, , they think that that’s something wrong and that they, that they attack the church and lose their testimony [00:09:00] because of, they can’t resolve that issue in their minds, but we can’t resolve that in our minds.

We have to know that Jesus Christ loves us. You, me, everybody the same and wants us all back. So he has a plan. I’m not going to get the answers to that plan. You know, I’m going to know the things I need to do. But for me, it’s to love that grandchild unconditionally. And I do because he was my first grandson.

I love his partner. He’s a wonderful person. You know, I’ve got other, come up with my children who are just sort of teetering on the edge and doing different things. It’s like. That’s okay. They’re going to know that I love them and that I’m standing firm here for them all the time because I know that’s what Jesus Christ is doing, but I’m not, he’s not the wanderer, you know, in my life.

I’m the wanderer. Right. It’s, it’s just [00:10:00] so important to just plant your feet on that rock and just anchor yourself, you know, tether yourself to his, his, you know, just anchor yourself in his rock and, and, Sometimes you have to sit on that rock and cry, and, and feel sadness, and to rage, and to get those feelings out, but that’s just an expression of what’s going on inside. 

 If you’re centered and focused and solid, the Lord’s gonna, it’ll be like me saying to my, your, your, your little child, have you a temper tantrum, this will be okay, you’ll be okay, things will work out, you know, it’ll pass, and in everything we do as men, women, parents, It’s, it’s a, it’s sort of a repetition of what the Lord does for us on a human scale.

I mean, certainly not as a spiritual scale, but there’s just so much evidence and so much feeling and so many experiences [00:11:00] that I’ve had where I’ve just, I have felt that, that warmth, that almost physical hand on my, you know, my shoulder, just that uplift that. I see you. I know you. And the more often we look for those experiences, the more often we recognize them.

And then when stuff happens, the year I turned 50, everything that could happen, happened. I had a grandchild who was stillborn. My husband went away to an addiction recovery program. My twins, boys, were on a mission. And so, my husband left first, then the grandson died. And then all these things happened, and it was just my daughter and I, who has a disability, so she lives with us.

I was alone. I have never felt so alone in my life. And so I started writing a journal. That’s something that’s really important. If anybody wants advice to stay close to the Lord, is to write a journal. Not like, I did this today, I did this today. But even [00:12:00] just, I noticed how beautiful the sunset was. And when I looked at it to that moment, it was just for me.

So it’s like you create that mindset. So just look at that one thing, one thing. Oh, I had cold water from the fridge today. I needed it, and turn it over as a thought of gratitude to the Lord and, and you’ll stay connected, but when all those things happen and I was alone, I mean, I was, I was just devastated because I couldn’t cope myself and, it was a really hard time, and one thing I did, I started writing, I was going to, I told Steve, I’m going to write you in my, this is your recovery journal, I’m going to write every day something that I feel, and at first it was a lot of anger, you know, I wrote it all out, and it was just for him, so I just would write, and I would write, and then it started to be more introspective, and then it started to be more understanding of, this is not all about me, it’s [00:13:00] about him, and our family, And so that process of writing really helps us get through and connect, and see ourselves from a different perspective.

And, I found in that, I was looking at my cupboard the other day, like last week, and I opened it up and I had this little journal that I’d kept and there was a little sticky note in there. And I looked at it, and I opened it up, and it was a note from my father who passed away last year, last January.

And I opened up this little thing and it said, his handwriting. He said, I stopped by to see you and I couldn’t bear to wake you because I know you needed your rest. You don’t have to do this alone. Love dad.

Karen Papin: Sweet.

Jackie Swainson: I don’t even remember seeing it at the time, but now all this time later I’ve seen it and he’s not here with me, but he was there with me in that moment.

So we do have those tender mercies that happened to us all the time and we just have [00:14:00] to be thankful for them because things are going to be tough. You know, sometimes they’re just going to be. Wailing on the bathroom floor, ugly, crying, tough, right? That’s life.

Karen Papin: Yeah. A couple of things kind of stood out as you were talking.

One was just that focus that you have on being willing to feel those emotions, even when they’re hard emotions. And, And you kind of talked about how writing can kind of help you in processing those emotions. What, what are some other things that people can also do to be able to process some of those emotions that are a little more difficult to feel?

Jackie Swainson: Well, all those emotions stay with us unless we process them, and even after we process them in whatever way we do them, they still show up because we remember the trauma, remember those things. So, it depends, on what it, what it is that brings you joy. I love to watch, I live out in the country, I love to look at the sunrise, sunset, [00:15:00] stars, and just sit and listen to the quiet, breathe, you know, take that moment of just, dump my brain at anything and just be. There’s different techniques you can use, to help regulate your nervous system when you’re going through hard times and that is, sort of taking your heightened level here down to here and there’s things like tapping. There’s breathing, there’s, cognitive thought therapy, there’s, sort of parallel thinking, there’s, writing, and writing is good if you promise yourself you’re going to be dead honest about it.

So like if you say, I’m going to write and if, even if it’s really ugly stuff that you’re writing, write it and don’t censor it because it’s free. If you want to share it, fine, but my journals are for me. So to write it and get it out. Of your mind onto paper. So that’s one step. And then second is reading it again and then keeping that in mind as a LDS woman, keeping that in [00:16:00] mind when I’m going to go, to church on Sunday and particular sacrament, because that’s my opportunity for that week.

You know, I can fast for other people. I can take the sacrament, but the sacrament is not for other people. It’s for me, right? We forget that it’s not just something we do. It’s for us. We are making covenants and renewing our covenants to remember. So if I remember the feelings that I had and I’m asking the Lord, I’m turning them over to the Lord and ask him to help me in that moment to have his spirit to be with me.

And I mean, that’s, that’s how I believe we need to use the sacrament is, is as a personal

Jackie Swainson: opportunity to say, like, you’re talking to your dad, well, you know, this was really tough and I did this, this, this and this and it’s still not over, but, and I need some help with this. Can you help me and you’re in that sacred space of the sacrament. It’s hugely powerful. I think we don’t teach our children [00:17:00] and a lot of times we’re looking around church and we’re talking to each other.

I mean, that’s normal, right? I’m not a perfect sacrament taker. I do those things too, right? But at the core, that’s what I’d like to be every week is just in that sacred moment, focusing on something that is for me. Because the sacrament is for me, and it’s for you, and it’s that, opportunity we get every week to be square with the Savior.

And, I mean, what he did for us is what that whole sacrament is about. It’s not just what he did, but what he is going to continue to do for us. And we’re just ordinary human beings that are running around trying to make sense of everything, and, you know, sometimes we don’t get it. We don’t get it. And, you know.

Lord could probably, I was watching this, I’ve watched this video series, The Chosen, which is quite lovely. I’m late to the [00:18:00] party, I just discovered it. And I’ve taught seminary three or four times, so I love that historical, the way they put it together. I love the LDS videos. I like this one because of just the realistic cultural things that it contained.

But I’m thinking those, you know, Peter was just like, or Simon before he became Peter or Johnny, but just like me. They’re looking right at the Savior. They’ve seen it. They felt it. And they’re going, huh? You know, like they still didn’t understand, but every time he taught them and the more he embraced them and the more they listened and the deeper he got, I liked the concept of them showing the Sermon on the Mount as what he needed each of his apostles to know for when he was gone.

Every step is a preparation for what was to come. And for us, every step is a preparation of what we get to enjoy. So, it’s just, for me, it is so important for us as women, particularly [00:19:00] to be, confident in our relationship with the Lord, to recognize his love for us, to feel it, to look for it, to ask for it, and to manifest in different ways in our lives, what that means to us.

So I might show it in a different way than you do, but to consistently. Nurture that relationship, because once you reach my age, and your kids are all gone, and you’ve got grandkids, I mean, there’s still stuff that you have to do, but you realize more and more that, okay, this life is leading me somewhere.

Like, I’m not going to be here for an eternity. Like, it’s leading me to a place, and I need to be so that I can be in that place. And, everything that we do extends beyond the surface. If we let it, I think a lot of times we sail through our faith and we sell through the church without giving a lot of thought to why we’re there or the faith it takes to get those little kiddos up the door [00:20:00] and try to be on time and, to not take offense when somebody might say something and I’ll give you an experience that I had.

And I’ve been a Relief Study President a couple of times, I’ve been a State Relief Study President, like, I’ve done everything, so I should know everything, right? But I don’t. I really don’t. I was at a funeral for a friend, a friend’s funeral, and I had brought a bunch of food and set it up and said, I’ll come back after and help.

And I went to the service, I was at the church. So as soon as the service ended, I put my apron on and ran out there, and people were taking food back. And I said, Oh, I’m ready, you know, the service is done, people are just visiting, what can I do? Now being a Relief Society. President, if you’re in a presence, you know, well, if somebody asks you for a job, you should give it to them.

Even if it’s just picking up garbage, right? Oh, nothing. We’ve got everything. We don’t need we don’t need anything. And I thought, okay, I had a moment where I thought, well, here, I’m in my apron. Ready to serve and just be a [00:21:00] set of hands. And I was just told no. Now, my first response was. You’ve got to be kidding me.

So I went inside. I thought, oh. You know, big mistake. Fortunately, I had the testimony that carried me through that, but I thought how many people would just say, Oh, I’m not needed and walk away. And so I just went and started picking up garbage and just doing little busy stuff, but I just talked to my husband about it later.

And I said, how many times and how many people do we know who have stopped coming to church or who have left the church or have hard feelings because we have not acknowledged their desire to serve or we’ve not noticed them. Or we’ve kind of brushed them aside. And so there is a responsibility because we are of divine worth and a divine nature that we let other people know that they have that as well and that we see that in them.

Karen Papin: That’s a good [00:22:00] point.

And I think that the more that we take that time to recognize and understand who we are, the more that we actually start to have that desire to be able to share that with others as well.

Jackie Swainson: Absolutely. You know, you see somebody in your ward who’s struggling, you know, go up and talk to them. Give them a hug, introduce yourself, get to know them, serve them, you know, even if you’ve never met them, the impact that that will have on them is the Lord’s love will be felt by them, but the impact it will have on you is that you will know that you were listening to that prompting.

And so the Lord does talk to me and I can listen and I will do.

Karen Papin: So there’s. A couple of things I want to point out. One is I really like that view that you had of the sacrament, where it’s like, this is a time that I get to have to [00:23:00] really connect with my savior and to feel his love for me. And so just viewing that, like going into sacrament and viewing it that way, that, that is beautiful.

Like just how profound. Of a change that can be if we, if we do that.

Jackie Swainson: So just to comment on that. I have a husband, obviously, but I have a husband who likes to like to say he’ll be reading something. It’s really uplifting. He said, Oh, I should share this with stone. So, or you should read this or this is for.

I’m like, dang it, Stephen. It’s for you. So you know, when, and I’ve heard people say, well, man, I was just really praying and taking the sacrament for person A, B, C, or D. And I’m like, you’re praying for them and thinking about them, but you’re taking the sacrament for you so that you can help them with A, B, C, and D.

Right? So there’s, it’s just a mindset and a mind shift, but it’s so powerful. It just changes our experience of that connection. [00:24:00]

Karen Papin: Yeah. I love that. One of the other things that kind of stood out to me is how you had that experience, at the funeral where you’re like, I wanna help. Mm-hmm . And they’re like, no, and . And yet you still looked for opportunities to serve like you. You didn’t just give up or give in or just say, I guess don’t. Well, maybe you had the thought, I guess they don’t want my help, but you actually kind of pushed that thought away and was like, okay, well, I’m going to find a way to help.

Jackie Swainson: And that that’s because of the experience. So being a Relief Society president, in a ward or a stake or young women’s parliament, whatever, whatever you do when you’re in leadership, you really realize right away, first thing, this calling is not about me. I mean, there’s things I can learn and things I can do, [00:25:00] but it’s about who I can serve and how I can help other people.

My initial thought was, well, this really sucks. Why would they say that to me, who’s been around for so like, I had this dialogue and I’ve done everything and I’m doing all this stuff. And then I just sort of thought, well, , I pushed those thoughts aside and just went and did because. I got out of those thoughts, so it was a vulnerable moment for me to be ready to just why me, poor me, and sort of go down that little bit of a cycle, but I recognized that, and I’ve done it before, but I recognized that if I went and just did, then I would take myself out of my private pity party, and I’d put myself into a space where I was contributing something to somebody somehow.

And, that changed the moment, and I don’t, I have a disclaimer, I don’t always come out of those moments, like, in the right way, at the right time, you know, I don’t, but [00:26:00] I’ve done it often enough to know that, that it is the way to, it is the right way for me to show up, and to be present, and I have watched Sisters Sisters.

In our, my board, when I was the referee president, somebody saying something in a lesson, and I can remember it clearly saying, you know, why, why do we have all these people that are coming to church, and they’re just wearing pants, and they’re not, you know, dressing up, and these, , we had some investigators, and we had some new members, and I was just, and it was actually my mother in law, and I was just like, no, no, no, no, no, you can’t be saying this, so right away I said, we’re here at church, we come in our best as our best, And what is my best might not be your best or anybody else’s best, but the important part is that we are here.

If I came today in my pajamas because I was late, it might be funny, but I felt compelled to be here, so I showed up. [00:27:00] And that experience, because I saw people leave the room because they were hurt with something that was just not intended, right? It wasn’t intentional. So, what we say is so important, but what we do after we say it, I think is more important.

And so I did go out and have conversations with those sisters and said, you know, listen, that’s just personal perspective. It’s not the Lord judging. You’re here. I’m so glad you’re here. We want you to come. Come as you are. You remember, was it Wilfred Woodruff or one of the earlier Dibbo 30s say, you know, the best church meeting to be at would be where you can smell alcohol in everybody’s breath.

Yeah. Yeah. So because it means they’re here because they’ve chosen to be here no matter what they’re doing. They wanted to come. Right.

Karen Papin: Yeah. And, I think it was Sister Freeman, a few conferences ago, she talked about how [00:28:00] Christ meets us where we are. And so following this example, meet people where they are.

Help them to feel that love. It goes back to how we talked about, we have a responsibility to share, , help others fail to see their divine work too.

Jackie Swainson: It’s not just meeting them where they are. It’s accepting them where they are. Cause I’ve seen people and witnessed experiences where, you meet them where they are, but it still comes across as being maybe condescending or maybe.

A little judgy or you know, it’s okay if you come like this, but you know, or don’t put but in there. But if you put the word but, , just so if, if it was Jesus Christ that was there and we recognize that we are ha we’re his hands and feet and his doers here on this earth, that’s what we do.

We’re there to spread his love to other people is if he was there, he would not only see you and meet you, he would accept [00:29:00] you

and, that’s really important.

Karen Papin: And I think this, this applies both to those who, were the receiving end of the hurtful comments, or whatever it was, and it also applies to those who. We’re the ones who said the comments, and just like, because sometimes we say the wrong thing. And so it’s like, okay, I, that’s where the atonement comes into play.

So still love who love yourself, accept yourself and the weaknesses that you have and recognize them. And then you can move forward to learn and grow and apply the atonement in your life.

Jackie Swainson: Well, one of the, one of the most, life changing experiences I had was as a Relief Study President. I was quite young the first time, and the Bishop had given me an assignment to go in and talk with this woman and have, some things happen in her life and help facilitate.

And of [00:30:00] course, I’m just doing, you know, doing it and whatever. And, six years later, five years later, she was visiting in our ward because they’d moved and she’d come back and she was telling this story about how a sister had made her feel not a good mom. Not doing, you know, listed off a few things and related enough of the incident.

I knew that that was me that had done that. And first of all, I felt horrible. That she had carried this. I had made her carry these feelings for those five or six years that she had been gone. And after sacrament, I went up to her and I Just, I said, I apologize so sincerely because I know you were talking about me.

And she said, I know you did. I wanted to give you, you and I the chance to, to forgive one another and be together. Now [00:31:00] that was such a gift from someone and it was me going about my business, but I just was not having the spirit with me in that instant when I was helping her. And all those things I’ve made her feel that she carried around.

And so since then, it’s like, I’ve really learned, I really learned that lesson that I, you know, I’m not going to say anything that would compromise the savior, my belief in the savior or his love to anybody. And sometimes you just have to be quiet and listen,

Karen Papin: so you work with midlife women. Mm hmm. What are some of the things that really keep them, like the limiting beliefs, what are some of the limiting beliefs that really keep them from being able to recognize their worth?

Jackie Swainson: But sometimes it’s letting go of the past. So past things that have happened up to this point in their lives, they still carry and they [00:32:00] haven’t dealt with them.

 Sometimes there’s a lot of changes. We feel like our best years are done, you know, sometimes in the church, we don’t have the callings that we used to, we’re wise and knowledgeable, but like, you know, we don’t sort of have the opportunity to use that. A lot of women go through divorce after their children are gone.

Jackie Swainson: I work with a lot of women have their husbands, their spouses that find more attractive women. They’re looking to, I don’t know what the men are looking for. Well, I know what they’re looking for, but the woman is sort of stripped of her femininity and her desirability. Like that part of our identities is gone.

It breaks you. It just breaks you right down. So you feel totally worthless. Feeling that you’re no longer relevant to your children. Maybe you’re not relevant to your neighbor. Like, you feel a little more irrelevant. In a, in a world that’s so focused on the culture of youth looking young, [00:33:00] you know, like, I don’t want to look at my age.

I don’t want to look like I’m 30. I, you know, I don’t always look in the mirror and think, way to go, Jack, you’re getting old. But it’s like, you know, it is what it is, right? It’s, it’s just one of those things. A lot of time is the anxiety about aging, and the future, and what is my time like left? What have I done that’s makes a contribution to the world?

What will be remembered? So all those kind of legacy questions, and the realization of mortality sets in, and that can be very scary, if you’re not You know, living close to the Lord. That’s a very scary thing. A lot of people feel stuck. They feel stuck on all the past things that they don’t like, or that were traumatic, or things that happened because they’ve never had the opportunity to go through them.

 and I work with them to try to create a shift to sort of new experiences. [00:34:00] And on new things . I just did a blog on my experience. One of my fellow coaches and I were talking and my experience was I was just burnt out.

 I was always like this and like this and I was tired. I was cranky. My mom’s got dementia. My dad died from dementia last year. I’m over, over exhausted. compassion fatigue and everything so I decided okay, no more clients, no nothing, I’m just going to take care of myself.

So I did that. And so every year at New Year’s, I have, since I’ve been probably about 35, instead of having a resolution, Oh, I’m going to do this, this, this, and this, then two weeks later, I’ve blown it. So I just, I’m like, okay, I just shredded a whole year expectations in like two weeks. So I’ve learned to, I choose a word.

And so this year, my word is becoming, and it was last year too. And it might be my word for the next few years. Because the process of becoming is evolving. It’s a forward movement, it’s [00:35:00] action, it’s not being stagnant or stuck. And so I wrote a really good blog about it.

So if anybody wants to go to my website and read the blog, it applies to anybody at any age, but it’s just a process of, becoming who you are today and tomorrow you’re going to be different. And it’s the realization that life is not over, that there still is so much more to experience.

And, it was really a very tender, , like the scripture in Isaiah where it talks about beauty for ashes, I love that and, the savior will take what’s wrong and what the things that we’re experiencing that are messy and all that, you know, ash that’s dirt that’s on the ground and bring something beautiful

and

make us beautiful.

So, anyway, there’s so much that we could talk about for sure.

Karen Papin: Well, you had a really good, like small, simple action that people could [00:36:00] take to start embracing their divine worth. Go ahead and share that with us.

Jackie Swainson: Yeah. I’ve used lipstick, but don’t use lipstick anymore because it’s terrible to get off to make and greasy, but like a, a nice bright color of a dry erase and you know, I’ll go through phases and I’ll put it on my, on my mirror in my bathroom and I will say things like, hello, gorgeous, you know, and I’m, you know, not looking at, but it’s like, what a nice person who wrote that or just a reminder, you know, today is a day to be kind or, I am a daughter of God or Jesus loves me.

And this all started when, I have a quilt shop too and, it had a mirror that my husband made for me and I made a cricket sign underneath it said, mirror, mirror on the wall. What the heck happened? Because I was finding as I getting older, you pass the mirror, it’s [00:37:00] like, whoa, who is this person?

I’m that person. I’m like, I’m getting older. And so I wanted to be able to embrace the mirror and appreciate without sort of like just whatever it is that you can, and I change them, like, I don’t keep them the same all the time.

And, like, I am me and me is enough is what I’ve done before. And, or just stop and look. So I’ll stop and just look. And I look at my eyes. I’m not looking at everything else. It’s a very easy way to connect with self. And it’s an easy way to put your mind in a phrase where you’re not thinking, Oh, you’re looking at yourself critically.

You’re looking at yourself in a playful fun. And trying to see yourself as the Lord sees you in a way, you know, I’ve written things like, I’m so glad that you, reached out to so and so today. So I’ll write that on, on Sunday night after church, go to bed, I get up in the morning and I’m like, yeah, I’m glad I did that too.

Thank [00:38:00] you for reminding me. I’m thanking myself, but it’s like, we have to create the mindset and the atmosphere for our brains to live in that space of gratitude. And knowing our worth, even though life is crazy, busy, wackadoodle sometimes, it’s knowing you’re okay as you are, the way you are, and that wherever you’re trying to get, you’ll get there with the Lord’s help.

And that’s, that’s the simple, that’s basically the plan.

Karen Papin: So I have just one more, one, two more questions for you. What is your favorite divine or scripture?

Jackie Swainson: One scripture that always puts me in that space of the connection with feeling divine is. When the Lord says, be still and know that I am God, [00:39:00] and it takes me back to the story of how all the, all the Lord wanted to do is the children were wasting themselves in the wilderness for those 40 years with the signs and miracles.

He just wanted them to know that he was there. So when I sort of be still and know that I am God, when I think about that and just stop and think, it’s like, okay, I’ve got this. I know that. And it speaks, it speaks to me to know that I’m of worth to him.

Karen Papin: How can those listening connect with you?

Jackie Swainson: Oh, you can connect with me through Instagram. Which is at Jackie Swainson coach. You can connect with me. I’m on Facebook. It’s called everyday greatness, but it’s just a feed that comes. It’s my coaching feed. Mostly it’s throughout and my website. All my information is on my website.

It’s Jackie Swainson coach. com. So it’s like pretty simple. It’s just my name [00:40:00] with the coach. com and there’s stuff on there that you could get to know me by just reading through. There’s ways that you can just things that my clients have told me. Talk about how some of the steps that we, you know, that I have gone through and lived through and I think the most important thing for people to know when they are, and you know, I do an email every week and, I include my phone number on it because I’m very, you know, I do have people that call just up and say, Oh, that was such a great thought.

Or what do you really think? Because I want people to know

who I can know who they are. And because I’ve learned how to become authentically me, I know I can help other people sort of tap into that authentically them, which is our divine worth It’s not anything else. That’s our essence. That’s who we really are. So, I answer emails. You know, my email is JackieSwainson at me.

com. So everything is pretty Jackie Swainson, you know. You can Google it and get all that information. So, I [00:41:00] love. People reaching out. I love to visit. I love to meet people and see their stories. I don’t mind telling my story, but I would like to sit here and say, okay, now, Karen, tell me your story.

It’s more interesting, actually, probably than mine.

Karen Papin: Yeah, I love hearing people’s stories too.

Jackie Swainson: I do too. It’s such a journey, isn’t it? Life is a journey. Think of all the different steps that brought us to this moment where you and I are sitting together. Bye. Do these things just happen, you know? Yeah. No, they don’t it.

Yeah. No, they don’t. It’s all planned. It is a plan. And people say, well, it’s just coincidence. I, and my response is, it’s, everything’s a plan, but if you don’t make the choice where that’s put before you for the plan to go this way, it’ll go another way. You still have a choice, but try to choose what? Try to choose from your divine worst, from your inner, inner being.

What you believe will bring you [00:42:00] closer, keep you close to God, and then it. It just becomes more, it becomes easier. And then you can see it more because you’ve made, you’ve chosen your way into that way of life thinking. It’s sort of, it’s hard to fall into that, just to fall. I guess sometimes if you’re, if it’s really desperate, things are really, you know, if you’re falling, you know, the Lord can rescue you and he will and he often does.

But just to sort of be in that space is. So, well, it makes you confident. It makes you happy. It makes you comfortable. It makes you feel like you have a vision, makes you want to help others. It’s just, such a great place in life to be.

Karen Papin: Yeah. Well, Jackie, thank you so much for, for being able to come on here, being willing to come on here and share your experiences and expertise.

And it’s, it’s been wonderful talking with you.

Jackie Swainson: Oh, well, it’s fun to share. And one time, I’ll interview you so that I can look into what your story is. [00:43:00]

Karen Papin: Sounds good. Okay, thank you so much, Karen. Thank you, Jackie.

Speaker 2: If you have found this podcast to be a light, please share it with others and leave a review. This helps others to be able to find the podcast as well. If you are struggling with feeling fearful, overwhelmed, or struggling to see God’s love for you, for a limited time, I am offering to create a personalized meditation specific to you.

What you’re struggling with, and what you hope for. This meditation will give you strength as you learn to manage the thoughts in your mind in order to have more faith in God’s plan for you. To get your own personalized meditation, go to karenpapin.com/meditation or click on the link in the show notes.

You are of worth, you have a purpose, the Lord loves you, and he believes in you, and only you can make the impact on this world [00:44:00] that you are meant to make. Join me next time as we talk more about divine worth and potential.